The question that most pastors and members struggle with is why some people who attend church and go through the motions of living the Christian life see very little change in their lives. They still have the same habits, same tendency to sin, and their character remains untouched by the Holy Spirit. Many of them may read the Bible, pray, give, and worship, and still remain unloving, lack kindness, humility, self-control, joy, and patience. Is it because they are unwilling or unable to change?
In order for change to be facilitated in the life of the believers, we suggest three necessary factors: understand their identity in Christ; belong to a loving, joy-filled community; and experience the work of the Holy Spirit in their lives. There are many other factors out there that bring about change, but these listed are the ones we will be focusing on.
In this article we are not claiming to have all the answers on how to become like Christ, or saying that if you follow these ideas you will reach “perfection.” Becoming like Christ is so much richer than following a list of to-do’s and how-to’s. It’s about intentionally following Him every day, and determining in our hearts to be faithful and obedient to Him.
Understanding Our Identity in Christ
Scripture makes a strong link between our desire and commitment to change and our identity in Christ. The more we understand, know, and believe what our identity is, the more we will be inclined to live a holy life. The apostle Peter writes, “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy” (1 Peter 2:9-13).1 Here Peter reminded the believers of their identity in Christ, drawing on various Old Testament passages to affirm that they are special people, chosen by God, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, and God’s special possession. Then Peter urges them to live a holy and righteous life, since God has brought them out of darkness into His marvelous light. They no longer belong to the world, but to Him (see also Col. 3:12).
Many of my adolescent years were spent trying to change. I, Emily, had the desire to be more loving to those around me, to treat others from a posture of genuine kindness, and have a true type of joy. I, however, didn’t know how to change. The more I tried to change, the harder it was. Then one day in high school a Bible teacher talked about who we are in Christ. She shared about how we are saved in Christ, and that this is a work done by God’s grace so that no man can boast (see Eph. 2:8-10). This was the first time I had heard this truth, and it changed my life. God’s kindness drew me into repentance. I began to spend more time with Him as a response to His love for me. And as a result of understanding my identity in Jesus, that I was chosen, had every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, I naturally started to become more like Him. Understanding my identity in Christ changed everything.
Being Filled With the Holy Spirit
It is difficult to attain meaningful change without the Holy Spirit. Try as we might through our own willpower and strength, at the end of the day there is a work in our lives that can be accomplished only through the Holy Spirit. Someone can change without the Holy Spirit. Secular and hedonistic people change all the time! But taking on the character of Christ can be accomplished only through the power and work of the Holy Spirit in our lives.
There are many examples in the Bible in which a life is transformed by the Holy Spirit. The disciple Peter, for instance, goes from being a coward and swearing he never knew Jesus (Matt. 26:69-75) to then being full of the Holy Spirit and boldly proclaiming the gospel in front of a large crowd (Acts 2:4-38).
In Luke 11:13 Jesus urges His followers to be filled with the Holy Spirit daily: “If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” Jesus makes it very clear that we need to be filled with the Holy Spirit continually, and that this is a gift that He desires to give us.
When I, Joseph, accepted Jesus Christ into my heart, I listened to a sermon about what kind of thoughts to have in our minds. “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Phil. 4:8). This text really resonated with me, and I wanted to do what the Scripture urged me to do. But I felt weak, and unable to do it. I asked the pastor about how to really live this wonderful Christian life. He told me that it is possible only by the power of the Holy Spirit, and that I need to ask for the Holy Spirit every day. So I started to pray daily to be filled with the Holy Spirit. I began to adopt the phrase “Holy Spirit, You are my senior partner. I want to be guided by You daily in every aspect of my life.” The more I pray this prayer and earnestly seek the Holy Spirit, the more I have thought God’s thoughts.
Dallas Willard once wrote, “The first most basic thing we can and must do is to keep God before our minds. This is the fundamental secret of caring for our souls. Our part in thus practicing the presence of God is to direct and redirect our minds constantly to Him. . . . If God is the great longing of our souls, He will become the polestar of our inward being.”2
Understanding my identity in Christ changed everything.
Belonging to a Joyful Community
One way that we can experience change is by belonging to a loving and joy-filled community of faith. The early church modeled this concept of joy. We find in the book of Acts that they “ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people” (Acts 2:46, 47). Living the Christian life brought joy to the believers as they lived in community, practiced the spiritual disciplines, and worshipped God.
For the past three years I, Emily, have had the honor of pastoring a church in Oregon. I learned a lot about how having a sense of joy in community helps you feel as though you belong, creates stability when things go wrong, and makes it easier to be yourself and to feel free to share your heart. The joy that was created and cultivated at the church largely had to do with the fact that the church was excited to see each other, and I them. Together we created a strong bond of joy.
Some of Jesus’ final words to His disciples were about joy. “I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you” (John 15:11, 12). When Christ’s joy is in us, we are then fueled to love people around us as He has loved us. Jesus shares His joy with His disciples; therefore the disciples should share His joy with others. Joy is a foundation of love.
John Mark Comer writes, “As a general rule, we become more loving by experiencing love, not by hearing about it in a lecture or reading about it in a book. Psychologists’ basic rule of thumb is that we are loving to the degree that we have been loved.”3 The temptation for churches is to engage in only one form of discipleship that is based on facts and information. In a thriving church, people are changed as they experience the love and joy of God revealed in the church members. It is “God’s kindness” (Rom. 2:4) manifested in community that draws people into repentance.4
Conclusion
In one of the churches I, Joseph, pastored, we had a time for testimony and prayer after the worship service. In one of these times, as the Holy Spirit was moving in a very powerful way, James stepped to the front, crying, and confessing he had an addiction to pornography. He boldly asked Jesus to give him the power to overcome.
It was a somewhat awkward time, because most of us didn’t know what to do. Finally one of the elders went to James, hugged him, and said, “You are a child of God. God loves you in spite of what you have done. We love you and care about you. Let’s pray for him to have victory.” Everyone rallied around James, prayed over him, reminded him of his identity in Christ, and claimed promises of victory over him. A few weeks later James said, “I have been set free from this addiction. I have been reading the Scriptures to fill my mind with the things of God. Every time I have been tempted, I have asked the Holy Spirit to help me overcome.” This change that James experienced was brought about through the work of the Holy Spirit and the love, care, and prayer the church gave him.
As a church, our role is to journey alongside people as they pursue a life with Christ. Becoming like Jesus is less linear than we might think. There are a lot of ups and downs along the way. But as we understand our identity in Christ, are continually filled with the Holy Spirit, and belong to a loving community, we will gradually begin to become more like Jesus.
1 All Scripture quotations are from the New International Version.
2 Dallas Willard, The Great Omission: Reclaiming Jesus’s Essential Teachings on Discipleship (New York: HarperOne, 2014), p. 125.
3 John Mark Comer, Practicing the Way: Be With Jesus. Become Like Jesus. Do What Jesus Did (Colorado Springs, Colo.: WaterBrook, 2024), p. 48.
4 For further information, read Jim Wilder and Michel Hendricks, The Other Half of Church (Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2020), p. 24.
