NE OF THE MAJOR REASONS I WENT to work for the veterans hospital was that I had an interest in the field of addiction. Specifically, I wanted to work with alcoholics. Not everyone likes working with alcoholics. They typically don't learn quickly; they don't always want what we have to offer; they often come in for treatment just to avoid the difficulties their disease has gotten them into. But then again, is that so different from the rest of us?

God wants to change our entire life, not just take away the problems. Often I tell my clients, "You can't just stop drinking. You have to work on the problems that led you to drink." They may stop drinking, but unless they resolve the other issues they are just a miserable sober person--or what is often referred to as a "dry drunk." The same is true in the lives of those who don't drink. We can't just stop "doing that sin." We may stop doing the act, but if our heart isn't changed, we are just a miserable Christian, always wishing we could do what we want to do and feeling restricted by the rules.

Everything I Know About
God I Learned From . . .
One of my clients has taught me much about God. I've known him for a number of years. I've worked closely with him as an inpatient and an outpatient for a little more than a year. He's respected by staff and peers alike. He's thoughtful, courteous, caring, and kind. He's a good worker. He's easy to get along with and pleasant to be around. You just can't help liking him. While growing up in an alcoholic family, he experienced all the abuse that is so often present in these families. He learned from a very young age to anesthetize the feelings of despair with alcohol--as he saw those around him doing. So much of what he hated in his family he now sees in himself. He inherited the disease of alcoholism, that inability to control the use of alcohol. The Bible says the sins of the parents are visited upon the children to the third and fourth generation. Today we call that heredity.

For the past year I have seen him each day to provide motivational support and to do a breath test for alcohol. Improvement has been present; however, the times of sobriety are still not very long. But his times of drinking are shorter, and he usually drinks less. Although I try never to let him know it, it sometimes gets discouraging seeing the slow progress. Sometimes I wonder, Why do I put so much energy into this? It seems so hopeless.

When I find myself ready to give in, I turn to my favorite chapter in the book The Ministry of Healing that speaks about working with the intemperate. Somehow it always inspires me to keep trying when I read, "Men speak of these erring ones as hopeless; but not so does God regard them. He understands all the circumstances that have made them what they are, and He looks upon them with pity. This is a class that demand help. Never give them occasion to say, 'No man cares for my soul.'"¹ In another paragraph it says, "Speak no word of censure."² So each time he drinks, I try to help him learn from the experience so that it will be less likely to happen again.

Each year a National Creative Arts Festival is held for Veteran Administration hospital patients. It's an important event for a veteran when they are chosen to go. The rules state that they must be able to remain out of the hospital for a certain length of time before they can attend. My client was chosen to participate in a group at the festival. This was especially important to him, because he would see his sister, whom he had not seen for many years. He looked forward to this trip for months.

However, as he sat alone in his apartment anticipating the visit with his sister, his mind naturally went to the trauma they had experienced as children. The depression and feelings of worthlessness came flooding into his mind. Thus he did what is so easy for him when he feels emotional pain--he drank. Not much at first; but one drink is all it takes for an alcoholic. Embarrassed to be seen at the VA drunk again, he didn't come in as usual, but he called each day.

Have you ever noticed that it doesn't take much to get you going the wrong direction? That missing your devotional time just once is all it takes to miss it for several days? Forgetting to ask for God's help just once is all it takes to start trying to do it in your own power.

The Power of the Will
Late Thursday afternoon we arranged to meet. It felt as though I was walking into a field of battle between the two most powerful forces in the world. I have no doubt about who has the most power or who will ultimately win the war. The only question left is the will of the individual. God never forces us to go against our own will. Though His heart may break, He continues to give us His great gift of free will.

All week I had heard my client tell me, "I can do it. I know I can. Don't make me come into the hospital. I want to go on that trip. I have to see my sister. Tomorrow I'll come in and blow zero on that breath test. I know I can do it." But on Thursday afternoon these statements were made with much less confidence. He was afraid to say he could do it. Nothing could have described him better that afternoon than this: "His promises and resolutions are like ropes of sand. The knowledge of his broken promises and forfeited pledges weakens his confidence in his own sincerity and causes him to feel that God cannot accept him or work with his efforts. But he need not despair."³

Through slurred speech and tears my client told me how much he wanted to stop drinking, how afraid he felt of himself, how worthless he felt. I listened, saying only enough to encourage him to keep talking as he poured out his anger, guilt, and frustration. I said, "I believe you when you say you have really tried to stop drinking. I've seen you struggle with this habit. I don't think you will ever stop drinking without the help of God." After a moment's thought he said, "You know, I think you're right." I asked if I could pray for him, and he was willing.

On Friday he didn't come in until late in the afternoon. He was still drinking. I felt there was no choice but to hospitalize him, but how I hated to prevent him from seeing his sister. As we talked, I thought, I have to do what I don't want to. He was begging me not to put him in the hospital.

Then came a series of those "just in the nick of time" events. The nurse who would be traveling with the group, although she had said she would not take him, now offered to take him along if he could stay sober for the next 48 hours. Why the pharmacy folks stayed late on a Friday afternoon I will never know. But we were able to get what he needed to take with him. Still, knowing him as I did, I knew that it wasn't possible for this man, on his own, to remain sober after the amount of drinking he had been doing. He might make it the first 24 hours with gut determination, but then the withdrawal symptoms would increase, and the only way to relieve them would be to drink. But I agreed to help him try.

I visited him in his home Saturday afternoon. He had experienced a difficult night, but the breath test read .000. He was sober. Sunday afternoon he was still sober. He left that evening with the group. Who says there are no miracles today? This was every bit as much a miracle as the miracles we read about in the Bible. It was a healing from God. Satan doesn't give up easily, and there may well be more struggles. But when we give Him our will, God can do amazing things.

Who Receives the Bigger Blessing?
As I work with this client, I can't help asking the question Am I helping him, or is he helping me? Or could it be both? I've realized that all of us are like my client, arguing, "I can do it. I know I can." But we can't. There is only One who can.

"Nothing is apparently more helpless, yet really more invincible, than the soul that feels its nothingness and relies wholly on the merits of the Saviour."⁴

May we each allow Him to heal us!

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¹ Ellen G. White, The Ministry of Healing, pp. 171, 172.
² Ibid., p. 172.
³ Ibid., p. 175.
⁴ Ibid., p. 182.

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Marilyn Butler is a mental health nurse in Knoxville, Iowa, and enjoys helping people find God's solutions to their problems.